angestories

Ange’s take on: the best ways to drink a Coke

I would venture a guess that there aren’t many moments in life when you pause to consider the most mundane, ordinary things that happen to and around you. And I bet there are even fewer moments when you might, having given those mundane, ordinary things thought by way of ranking or reviewing or deciding a preference of that thing, decide to share these thoughts with another human.

I am such a human. And I have a strong suspicion that there might be others out there like me who give time and energy to these types of thoughts.

One such thought I’ve had and shared, via an actual fully formed conversation was with my best friend. It came about because she was at my place and I offered her a Coke to drink, as you do. She remarked that the diminutive size of my smaller-than-normal Cokes were “cute.” Because they most definitely could not have been the most economical choice to purchase, there must have been some sort of witchcraft at play when I decided to buy them – I blame the tiny, adorable bottles that seemed to be crafted to fit perfectly in my tiny hands – see? Witchcraft. Or, marketing. Potato, potAHto. This was the catalyst to our very detailed, thoroughly serious discussion about the ways in which we enjoy consuming Coca Cola in the form of a ranked list.

This really happened. We are adults.

I should include a little bit of context before revealing the fruits of our conversation: I grew up in a “pop” house; meaning we had soft drinks around and were allowed to drink them (except with dinner – that was strictly a milk occasion). So, it’s not like Coke was forbidden to me.

I’ve spent most of my adult life drinking pop, particularly Coke (except for those restaurant industry days when I was forced to drink Pepsi – gasp! – because our restaurant was owned by Pepsi. It’s a period I don’t like to talk about much).

Anyway, over the last six years or so, I cut pop out – cold turkey! I just stopped drinking cola and pop of any kind and primarily just drank water, coffee and wine, (when the occasion called for it). I would only ever allow myself the very occasional Coke – usually if it was being offered, if I was at a restaurant, or visiting my parents. In other words, I stopped buying pop because if it was in my fridge, I’d drink it, and in case you haven’t heard, it’s not so good for you (which is disappointing).

I consume Coke a bit more often these days, but suffice it to say, it’s still very much a treat. So, when I talk about the best ways to drink a Coke, trust me, I know what I’m talking about.

So, herewith, my official ranking (as corroborated by my BFF) of the best ways to enjoy the fizzy beverage of champions. Champions of what, I have no idea, but it seemed like the most appropriate description of this liquid gold we call Coca Cola.

Best ways to enjoy a coke, ranked worst to best:

13. In a glass, flat and warm, no ice

12. From a can, flat and warm

11. From a bottle, flat and warm

10. Fountain coke, no ice

9. From a bottle, warm

8. Directly from a can, warm

7. In a glass, warm

6. Directly from a bottle, cold

5. Directly from the can, cold

4. In a glass, cold, no ice, poured from a bottle

3. In a glass, cold, no ice, poured from a can (it really does taste different from a bottle, I’m not making this up!)

2. Fountain Coke, lots of ice (especially when you’re after that distinct sugary hit of the syrup that can raise your blood sugar in 0.03 seconds)

And…the number one, absolute best, most delicious way to drink a Coke:

1. In a glass, cold, lots of ice, poured from a can or bottle, preferably a 2L bottle as opposed to any of the smaller sizes. It tastes different, it just does. I’m not a scientist, nor do I play one on TV, but it’s just the truth. That is simply the best. It’s blissful, it’s serene, it’s thirst-quenching and satisfying. Worthy of taking a moment to enjoy the glory of the act of consumption.

So there you have it, my definitive review of how best to enjoy a Coke.

Go forth and enjoy your Coke with a smile – a smug smile knowing that you’re doing it right.

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