So, full disclosure: I’m in a pretty serious relationship with my city. His name is Toronto. It’s a really loving, caring, supportive and thrilling relationship. Sometimes it feels like a torrid, salacious affair. Sometimes it feels like we’re in a rut, mutely watching TV together on the couch on a Wednesday night. But, that’s the way it goes in relationships, right? There are ebbs and flows, growth and stagnancy, a thick book with lots and lots of pages.
He’s a bit older, he’s definitely wiser, and he’s very steadfast. He’s also really popular, and sometimes I take a lot of pride in that, and sometimes it makes me a little jealous. I guess because I kind of just want him to myself, ya know? Although, I have to say, when he gets a shout-out in a Drake song, I tend to get a little flush with excitement.
We’ve been together for almost 8 years, Toronto and me. When I met him, I was admittedly running away from a really bad relationship with another city, but I think, in retrospect, I was also running toward something. Sure, I tumbled into Toronto’s arms with a bit of unbridled abandon, but he caught me and scooped me up in his shielding embrace, and I’ve never looked back.
Oh, we fight sometimes, though. He makes mistakes. Big ones. Huge. Did I just invoke Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman? Yup, I sure did. He can be really infuriating, but I’m sure I can be too. But, when we’re not bickering about transit or my shitty landlord, or the amount of his constant construction that continually impedes my already terrible sense of direction, I’m mostly in awe of him. He’s pretty fantastic.
The thing I love about him most is the way he makes me look at myself. And see myself. Seeing and looking aren’t necessarily the same thing. It’s as if looking at myself through the prism of Toronto, I’ve begun to see myself differently than I ever have before. Toronto, with his expanses of beauty and culture, his wonderful little surprises hiding in unexpected places, his openness and his love of diversity, has switched a light on inside me. And that little light has illuminated the reaches of who I am. Perhaps of who I was all along.
When Toronto and I first got together, even though technically it was a rebound, like I said, I felt like I was running to something. Well, it turns out I was running to someone too – me. And that’s why we’re so good together.
I think our future is bright, indeed ♥